You know it makes no sense at all. It was what, a week ago, where I couldn't seem to keep focus on the cash game tables, was getting bored with them, didn't want anything to do with them, and now I can't stay off of them. Go figure. I played tournaments yesterday and ended up making over $30 as I finished 1st in a $2 MTT and cashed in a couple other tournaments and I started today at $163. Started playing tournaments this morning again, but all day yesterday and this morning I kept switching the tabs and looking at the $10NL cash games. I knew I couldn't play them because I wasn't properly rolled, but I kept looking and looking and looking. Every fiber of my being wanted to fire up 4 cash tables. It was about 2:15 p.m. and a $1 MTT had been running about 4 minutes and I had not entered it yet. I had $155 and I said to myself to hell with it and I fired up 4 tables.
I can't tell you what my thought process was. Was I thinking to myself to hell with this let's go For broke with the cash games? Was I saying to myself I can risk a few buyins and if I lose I can switch back to the tournaments again? I don't know. I don't know what the actual thought process was all I do know is I had four tables going and before I knew it I was up buyin..... then I was up w buyins......then 3 and then 4. When I had the account balance back up to just over $196 I closed out all the tables, transferred the rakeback of $4 into my account, and had the $200 that I started June with. So the big question is what now?
The answer may have been provided to me by getting these account statements and documenting the earnings for December 2015 and each month of 2016. I noticed the best earnings were in December and January and then a drastic reduction. I did a little more fine-tuned computing and I found that it's even worse than I thought. The earnings I have listed on the right side of the blog are profits from the tables and bonuses and rakeback. However, if I fine tune this to find out just how much was made at the tables it's a shocking revelation. Money made at the tables for December and January was just under $471. For February March April and May profits at the tables are a loss of ($108.05). The only thing that saves me is bonuses and rakeback. Now if we take these one at a time February was my worst month with table losses of ($222.86) but February is also when I ended up in the hospital near death so I guess we could say I might have had other things on my mind at that time. I followed that with March earnings where there was no rakeback or bonuses in that month, but table earnings for April was only $3.94 and then table losses of ($77.44) in May. why did I have such a good December and January, comparatively speaking, and why am I looking so bad in the last four months with the exception of March and I believe that was the month that I had those two deep runs in the rebuys. I went back through my blog to find the answer and the answer is probably no great surprise, but my two best months, December and January, I was grinding cash games almost exclusively and over the course of those two months had played in excess of fifty thousand hands.
Now that I have completed my documentation of the earnings I look at these numbers and I keep focusing on the withdraws. $775 withdrawn and effectvely thrown away. It's enough to make me physically sick. It started with that first one in December then the withdrawals just kept coming, I kept withdrawing month after month after month. Both Joseph and Michelle tried to warn me about the withdraws, tried to warn me to leave my poker account alone, so did my readers, but I wouldn't listen, I wouldn't listen to anybody and now I'm where I'm at because of my own short sighted foolishness.
The point in all of this is that cash games is where it's at. I kind of knew this, but looking at the numbers really sends that message home. I have $200 again in my account and the way I see it I need to try to grind the cash games again. Hopefully things turn out better, hopefully I don't hit a downswing, hopefully I can start out on a heater and build, but either way I need to grind those cash games. However to what extent am I willing to go is the question. Is this an all-or-nothing venture?? If I end up dropping 10 buyins will I return to the tournaments, will I drop it down to $2NL, or will I just say It's all or nothing at the $10 level. Right now I don't have an answer for you. We saw how well the first attempt at grinding with just 20 buyns went and to be quite honest there has been another option that's been fluttering around in my head and that was to withdraw the whole thing, take it down to The Orleans and get in a $2/$4 game, and try to double it. Turn the $200 into $400, and having 40 full buyins to deposit back on WSOP. I have had sessions at $2/$4 where I have pulled in nearly $200 in earnings in just a couple of hours and a session like that is all it would take and I would be good to go. I actually like the idea of that, but if I have a bad session, and I end up losing that investment, I'm totally screwed. I'm not going to be able to put any money on WSOP until at least August and it certainly wouldn't be a $200 deposit maybe a $100, possibly $150 at the absolute outside so in essence I would be worse off than I am right now and if I did find myself in the situation with no money in the online account then I'm looking at playing freerolls each day in an effort to grind it back up from zero and the thought of that is hideous at best.
For right now I'm not doing a damn thing. I'm taking the rest of today off and tomorrow off as well. I will get back to it most likely on Thursday. On Thursday I will hit the online cash games but what the backup plan is I'm not quite sure yet. For all I know it could be grinding Omaha Hi-Lo SNGs. I'm going to take a couple of days and run this over in my head and see what I come up with. Until next time, take care everyone, and I'll see you at the tables.